Awful Beautiful Life

I love this crazy, tragic, sometimes almost magic, awful beautiful life…

The Big Burrito Debate November 13, 2008

Filed under: Marriage,Miscellaneous,Pregnancy — Sara @ 4:23 pm

I love Freebirds.  I even started a Facebook group to petition them to build one in Lubbock while we were living there (they actually have 3 there now!).  Over the past year or so, Terry decided that he favors Chipotle to Freebirds.  It’s like I don’t even know him anymore…  I tried it just to shut him up and was appalled.  It was awful.  Seriously?!?!  You like that place?  You like that place MORE than Freebirds?  I almost made him sleep on the couch that night.

Since then, several of our friends have also jumped on the Chipotle bandwagon and go on and on about how great it is.  I’ve attempted to de-friend them over it, but it hasn’t really worked out.  So a tiny part of me recently decided that it can’t be that awful.  Why would sooo many people go there and talk about how great it is?  It either actually is good or this is the biggest, most useless and expensive practical joke ever played on me.

Today, Nate and I went downtown to eat lunch with Terry.  We tried Shady Grove first (yummy), but there was a 25 minute wait and the pregnant lady and 17 month old were not waiting that long to eat. (In our defense, we had just driven 30 minutes to pick Terry up and were already hungry when we left the house…)  So, I quietly offer that, maybe, possibly we could go to Chipotle so I could give it a second chance.  Of course, Terry jumped at the opportunity, even though the 900 calorie burrito would break his diet for the day.  I’ve decided to compare my burrito experiences for you…

  1. Tortilla- this one goes to Chipotle.  I get the flour at Freebirds and it’s decent, but the Chipotle tortilla tastes more homemade and delicious-like.
  2. Chicken- Freebirds.  I don’t like spicy stuff.  At. All.  The chicken at Chipotle was ok, but it was a little too spiced and I’m sure what all parts of the chicken I was actually eating.  The goodness of the white meat chicken breast from Freebirds wins.  Hands down.
  3. Rice- Also better at Freebirds.  Chipotle rice has no flavor so they add cilantro to it.  I don’t like cilantro.  This one was an easy one.
  4. Cheese and sour cream- This one is a draw.  Although, you do have a choice of cheeses (or queso!) at Freebirds.  I am a lover of all cheese so I don’t really care as long as it’s on my burrito.  And sour cream is pretty difficult to mess up unless it’s old and moldy.  That would just be gross.
  5. Cookie- Freebirds wins again.  Mostly because they actually sell chocolate chip cookies.  And, because I have become particularly attached to chocolate chip cookies since becoming pregnant 9 months ago.
  6. Cups- Another draw.  I prefer styrofoam cups and neither establishment is willing to kill the environment to make me happy.  Negative points all around.
  7. Price- Chipotle.  We spent about $5 less today than we would have at Freebirds, mostly because Nate’s meal was $2 cheaper (this is particularly awesome since Nate only eats about half of his quesadilla usually).  Neither of us got drinks today, so that would add some to our normal tab, but it would still be slightly cheaper than Freebirds.
  8. Bathrooms- Draw again.  Neither place had great bathrooms (trust me, I have a lot of experience with public restrooms, mostly because I have a baby playing the drums on my bladder 24/7).
  9. Locations- Chipotle.  If I ever do decide that I like Chipotle, it’ll be great because they are EVERYWHERE.  The closest Freebirds to our house is about 25 minutes away.  Luckily, there is one less than 5 minutes from Terry’s work, so it’s not so bad when we go visit him for lunch.
  10. Chips- Freebirds.  I threw this one in there just to make the list an even 10 items.  I didn’t actually have any chips at Chipotle, but I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t like them as much as I like the chips at Freebirds. 🙂 (no, that’s not cheating.)

So there you have it, 4 for Freebirds, 3 for Chipotle, and 3 draws.  Unless my math is wrong (and it quite possibly is because I have a fried prego brain right now), FREEBIRDS WINS!  You should celebrate by eating it for dinner tonight.  You know you want to.

I guess that about wraps it up (ah, burrito pun…).  After today, I will say that Chipotle isn’t all that bad.  I will no longer gag when Terry mentions that he ate there, but he will most likely not be eating there with me again anytime soon.


Yes, I am Alive November 7, 2008

Filed under: Marriage,Miscellaneous,Parenting,Pregnancy — Sara @ 10:35 am

I know.  It’s been a while since we’ve talked.  But, I have an excellent excuse!  I like to call it pregnancy woe #435: Anemia.  If I had posted anything in the past two months, I would have been so dull and unentertaining you might not want to be my friend anymore, so really I was doing you a favor.  Now don’t get your hopes up too high about the awesomeness of this post, but here’s an update to all things Heath.

35 weeks prego.  I look tired...

35 weeks prego. I look tired...

It turns out there’s an explanation for why I never got the 2nd trimester energy, nails that could grow forever and never break, and headaches (and why I suddenly had the overwhelming urge to chew ice ALL THE TIME- so sorry @terrbear).  Sadly, I wasn’t diagnosed until about 6 weeks ago and the treatment takes 4-6 weeks to make you all warm and fuzzy inside again, so there went 3 months of my life…  Let me just tell you that anemia sucks.  But, luckily, what I was going through was treatable and not just another one of those pregnancy side effects that you have to suffer through in order to produce a beautiful child 10 months later (yes, 10, the 9 month thing is a LIE).  More sadly, the treatment sucks because your body just doesn’t want to take 5-6 times the amount of iron it needs so you get wonderful side-effects from that until your body can adjust.  BUT, a month or so later, you feel halfway back to your normal self.

I better enjoy being “myself” again, too, cause this baby’s coming SOON.  We keep telling Nate about the new baby and then lament to ourselves about how it’s going to rock his world to have someone else get attention in this family.  Then we realize, this baby is going to rock OUR world, too.  TWO KIDS!?!  Are you serious?  I don’t know what we were thinking…  But now, it’s happening, likely within the month (1 cm dilated yesterday!!).  And I’m sure it will be fine.  Or we will forget the beginning when it so was not fine at all because the rest is soooo much better than those first 2 months.

Nate’s growing by leaps and bounds everyday.  I can’t believe how big he’s gotten.  Ok, so his actual size is still pretty small thanks to our dwarf genes, but his mind is expanding like crazy.  He runs everywhere now, which is awesome for a mom who is 36 weeks pregnant and can barely waddle to walk, let alone run after him and scoop up his 23 pounds to keep him safe.  It’s also awesome because he can’t seem to keep his face without a bruise or scratch on it. 
16 months old.  How did he get this beautiful?!

16 months old. How did he get this beautiful?!

About the time an injury heals, he face-plants into a door, or pulls the kitchen drawer out and bangs the corner into his forehead, and here we go again with some gigantic bruise or cut that makes it look like we neglect or abuse our son.  He sure is a trooper, though.  A few minutes of crying and he never mentions it again. He’s so energetic that it was very difficult to take his picture this time around.  They were originally 12 month pics that turned into 16 month pics once moving and life got in the way of our oh-so-important picture schedule.  You’ll notice not a lot of smiling and A LOT of drool in them.  Luckily, he’s so cute and our photographer is so awesome that we still got tons of great images.

Terry and I took a “romantic” (read as we left Nate at home so we could take naps and go to a movie) trip to Lubbock to eat at all the awesome places we miss from college and go to a football game.  I’ll post more details about our adventure later.  Nate had his first real Halloween, which I will also post about later because there are just too many cute pictures to squeeze into an update post.  You can cheat and see them on our flickr page, but I will force you to look at them again when I finally blog about it.  We also had a super-fun Halloween party and you missed out if you didn’t come.  More on that in the Halloween post…  I sure am setting myself up to write a lot more posts before the baby comes.  Hopefully, you’ll get lucky and I’ll have time to get them all done. 🙂

Terry’s decided he wants to be in better shape when baby #2 gets here (yes, we still don’t know what the sex is and we’re still not telling what the names are).  He’s been dieting and working out like crazy and has lost something like 12 pounds in 3 weeks.  I’m so proud of him!  I, on the other hand, and am VERY close to passing that big, scary number on the scale.  Once I do, the scale and I will no longer be friends and it may end up being hidden away until this baby comes out.  Terry will just have to guess how his progress is coming until then.

So basically, I am still dying from this pregnancy, just in different ways that I was the last time we talked.  My back hurts in 3 places every night (and some times during the day) so my OB suggested I see a chiropractor.  Not sure if I’m going to try that out or not….  The baby has officially made my left lung/under rib area the resting place of its foot or hand or some appendage.  That feels great.  Heartburn has taken over my nights and Pepcid is my new best friend.  My restless legs have turned into one leg that cramps in 3 places most nights.  And my migraines have apparently returned after a very welcomed 2 month hiatus.  All I can say is thank goodness for darvocet (and those doctors better be right that it won’t hurt this baby!).

I think that’s all the highlights and complaints I have about the last two months.  But don’t worry, I’ll let you know if I think of anything else.  And look for new posts in the next week or so (crosses fingers).  I’ve really taken to this nesting thing and am running out of things I can do around the house since we don’t know the baby’s gender.  I’ve been focusing my energy on things like helping my stepmom re-decorate (like huge overhaul) her house (sooo fun to spend other people’s money!) and, hopefully, blogging more before the baby comes.  We all know I won’t be doing much of anything once this thing gets out of here (GET OUT, GET OUT SOON!).

Oh, and because I think this is the most hilarious thing from The Office in a long time:

“It squeaks when you bang it.”

“That’s what she said.”

And, because we beat #1 Texas last week (did you know?!?!?!), WRECK ‘EM!


A String Around My Finger September 4, 2008

Filed under: Parenting,Pregnancy — Sara @ 9:46 pm

Time and lack of sleep make you forget a lot of things.  Like how hard it can be to be pregnant, how hard it is to raise kids (I know, we’re only 15 months in, help!!), and things to remember before going to the hospital to pop out a baby (no, it’s not actually that easy).  I decided to make myself of physical list to remind me of these things.  The next time I pass the newborn rack at Target and swoon at the tiny little outfits, I hope to be able to resist that “I want another baby” urge.  If I don’t and bring the subject with Terry, I give him permission to thump me and direct me back to this post.


26 weeks prego.

26 weeks prego.

  1. Most importantly, no Dr. Pepper whenever I want it.
  2. Even with monitored Dr. Pepper intake, I will not sleep for more than a few hours at a time for at least 5 months.  And then 7 months after that because I’ll have a baby waking me up.
  3. My back will hurt for at least 4 months, EVERY. SINGLE. NIGHT.  Massages, heating pads, baths, and tylenol don’t help.  No matter how many times you try them.
  4. No drinking.  At the time in your life that you need to relax the most because you have incredible amounts of stress.  If there were a time in my life that I needed a drink, it is now!
  5. Migraines don’t always go away when you get pregnant.  They can get worse.  And you can’t take magic drugs.  It’s like a cruel joke.
  6. I cannot find a comfortable position to fall asleep in.  Or sit in.  Or walk in.
  7. Nothing fits right.  Even if it is made for prego people.  And even if people tell you that you look cute, you feel fat and awkward.  Especially when you start accidentally knocking things over with your belly.  Or try to fit through a space that you just can’t.
  8. Your feet and fingers swell.  I haven’t gotten to that point in this pregnancy yet, but I know it’s coming.  It’s awesome to be 9 months pregnant and get bad looks from strangers because you aren’t wearing a wedding ring.  AND, the end of this pregnancy is in the middle of winter, so my feet are going to be freezing when I’m wearing the one pair of flip flops that I can still fit my porkers in.
  9. You are tired everyday.  Fall asleep at your desk tired.  Forget things people told you 5 seconds ago tired.  Even in the “wonderful” second trimester if you already have a kid you’re running around after.  I can only imagine it gets worse when are pregnant and have 2 kids to wrestle with.
  10. Pregnancy makes you stupid.  Just ask Terry if you have questions about this one.  Or my old boss.  I think he started to wonder why he hired me when I started regularly walking into his office, only to turn around to go back to my desk to try to remember why I had walked all the way back there in the first place.  I actually forgot how to spell drool the other day.  “D-R-U-E-L?  No… D-R-E-W-E-L?  No… Oh well, I just won’t send that IM.”

Raising a Toddler:

My little Red Raider.

My lil' Red Raider

  1. They wake up early.  I am not a morning person.  Not even a little bit.
  2. They throw things.  Most of the time at your head.  Then they laugh about it.  And don’t understand the word “no”.  (my prego-induced stupidity is evident in the fact that I just typed the word “know” instead of “no” at the end of that sentence and had to go back and correct myself)
  3. They hit.  When you’re sitting down, the target seems to be your boobs.  Which are incredibly tender when you’re pregnant.  You get the idea.
  4. They are picky eaters.  One day they love macaroni and cheese.  The next they throw it at your head.
  5. They don’t talk.  At least not very much or very well.  Figuring out why they are whining and pointing randomly, which turns into screaming and flailing in the middle of Target so everyone is staring at you, is HARD.
  6. Every time you figure out their sleep schedule, they change and you spend 2 months re-figuring out what makes them happy and it only lasts a few days.  I think they do it on purpose.
  7. They FREAK OUT when you take something away from them or shut a door-  I’m talking running around aimlessly (often into things, hurting themselves, making them more upset), screaming, flapping arms mad.
  8. They poop and it stinks.  Normally, it’s not really that bad when it’s your own kid, but when you’re pregnant and have a weak stomach, it’s not so nice.
  9. They like their Daddy more than you.  (I’m pretending this is always true to make myself feel better)
  10. They are expensive.  Average cost of raising a child is a million dollars.  At least half of that must be spent on diapers in the first two years.

The Super-Fun Hospital Stay:


My sleeping angel (the only time he was an angel). 🙂

  1. Pack your bag a month early.  Babies rarely come right on time.  And they sometimes come early.  2 weeks early.  And usually in the middle of the night when it’s difficult to remember every item you MUST have to make the hospital stay bearable.
  2. Pack socks in your bag.  Your feet will be freezing when you are only wearing that sexy hospital gown (made sexier by the fact that you are HUGE underneath it).  Probably even more freezing in December than they were in May with baby #1.
  3. EAT ON THE WAY TO THE HOSPITAL.  This is FOR REAL the most important thing to remember.  After you get to the hospital, you don’t get to eat until an hour or so after the baby is born.  And labor can take a long time.  Like 18 hours.  And it usually starts in the middle of the night, which means you haven’t eaten since dinner (or bedtime snack 🙂 ) the night before.  I don’t think the doctors want you to eat before you get there, but it so would have been worth it.  It’s really not easy to push a baby out when you have no energy because you haven’t eaten in 24 hours.  REALLY.
  4. Your husband will get meals brought to him by your family from every delicious restaurant within a 5 mile radius of the hospital.  And he will eat them in front of you while you are in labor.  And you’ll drool a little bit (I spelled it right on the first try!!).  And beg him to let you have ONE BITE.  And he’ll say no because he’s a selfish %*&$, but ultimately because he loves you.
  5. When the nurses offer to take the baby so you can get some sleep, LET THEM.  You will have plenty of opportunities to listen to it cry over the next 18 years.  You need to sleep now so you don’t kill them then.
  6. When the nurse says to wait until you can’t stand the pain anymore to ask for the epidural, don’t wait.  It takes at least 30 minutes for the anesthesiologist to be paged to your room and then another 10 minutes for it to kick in.  If you wait until you can’t stand it anymore, how will you feel 40 minutes from then?  If you’re getting drugs anyways, don’t put yourself through anymore pain than necessary.  You aren’t proving anything to anyone, you’re just being stupid.
  7. Get drugs.  It hurts.  But, it’s worth it.
  8. The nursery doesn’t have to be perfect before you leave for the hospital.  The baby won’t sleep in there for at least a week (for some families months) after you get home.  Although, it’s probably best to prepare it a little more than we have for baby #2 (our current position is “do nothing until we know the sex”- which we won’t find out until it actually arrives…)  Why am I not freaking out about that?
  9. The second night is always harder than the first.  Apparently, this was written somewhere in the stack of paperwork they hand you when you check into the hospital. (Does anyone actually read that while in labor?!?!)  I was convinced I was a horrible mother that spawned a demon child (turns out only half of that was true) until I asked for help.  Turns out EVERY baby gives their parents a rough second night.  If your baby didn’t do this, please never tell me about it.  I will cry.  Twice.
  10. You will lose all sense of modesty during labor and delivery.  At least 3 doctors and 6 nurses (and anyone else you let in the delivery room) will see your hooha during the course of labor.  And you won’t care because you just want this gigantic baby OUT.

If you don’t have kids, hopefully you still want them after reading this.  If you do have them, hopefully you can relate and laugh a little. I inserted adorable pictures of Nate to help take your mind off of my bitching and negativity (I’m pretty pregnant right now, so I can’t be held accountable for my hormonal rants).  It’s not really that bad.  It’s mostly good, actually.  But, I don’t really want to do it a third time.  (most likely…) 🙂


My other lover August 11, 2008

Filed under: Miscellaneous,Pregnancy — Sara @ 8:32 pm

This probably isn’t the most appropriate place to reveal this, but here goes. For years, I’ve been in love with two men. I’ve decided it just isn’t right anymore.  I have to end it and move on with my life with Terry. This is really difficult for me considering the other lover is a doctor and is so sweet to me. But, he really complicates my life and just plain isn’t good for me.

You’re probably in shock right now.  Pick your jaw up off of the floor.  Stop dialing Terry’s phone number so you can keep him from reading this or try to break the news to him gently.  I’m in love with Dr. Pepper.  I know, it’s pretty anti-climactic, but it’s true!

I can remember when this affair got hot and heavy.  I was in 5th grade and I came downstairs for breakfast.  I poured myself a cup of DP and sat down.  My mom gave me a funny look and made some snide comment about how it wasn’t good for me, but she didn’t stop me.  Thanks, Mom.  You could have saved me years of pain!

Thirteen years later, I can honestly say that there have been days, probably even weeks, when all I’ve had to drink was Dr. Pepper.  Even in the middle of a volleyball tournament, we’d grab some lunch and I’d always have a Dr. Pepper.  Who needs water anyways?  Isn’t there water in Dr. Pepper?  I’ve even made friends through our mutual love for this wonderful beverage.  I recently got mad at a bartender at a wedding when he told me they only had coke because he had given all of the Dr. Pepper to the wedding next door.  I seriously considered crashing that wedding just to get the good stuff.

I only tried to give up Dr. Pepper one other time in my life.  It was the middle of high school and I had this crazy idea during the summer that I was going to be healthy.  I would eat right, work out all the time, and lose weight.  I’d been told an easy way to lose 5 pounds is to stop drinking sodas.  I figured if that’s what happened to people with a normal soda intake, I should lose at least 10.  So I made it about 6 weeks until I hurt some tendon in my hip and couldn’t play soccer or work out anymore.  I figured if I couldn’t follow through every party of my plan to be healthy, it was better to just give up altogether.  I went back to my 3-4 sodas a day ways.

In college, I started getting migraines.  I tried a lot of the prevention techniques suggested, but I just couldn’t fathom giving up caffeine when you’re staying up late studying and waking up for 8 o’clocks the next day.  I would rather take pills.  So I did.  And I still didn’t drink much water.

you complete me.

you complete me.

Then, I got pregnant with Nate.  The doctors mostly say “no caffiene!”.  I wasn’t thrilled with that so I googled it since everything you read on the internets is reliable and trustworthy.  I found several studies that showed having up to X amount of caffiene per day didn’t have an effect on the fetus.  Turns out that amount of caffeine translates into like 4 Dr. Peppers a day!  Of course, you’re also supposed to drink a lot of water when you’re pregnant, and if I drank that much Dr. Pepper AND water I’d be peeing every 5 minutes instead of 10.  So I decided to try to limit myself to one a day and try my darndest to drink water (bleh) the rest of the day.  It worked out pretty well, but I was back to my old habits once that baby popped out and was off the boob.

So that leads us up to today.  If you read my last post, you know how awesome this pregnancy has been.  I decided to try the one-a-day policy again.  It’s worked out pretty well and I’ve actually become addicted to water which I never thought was possible.  I’m guessing it’s because it’s so stinking hot this time around.

I’m still getting migraines and, in the past few weeks, have developed what I’m sure is RLS (yes, Jim Carrey, it is real).  Pretty much, I get into bed and am exhausted, but can’t fall asleep because my legs feel like they want to run a marathon (which will never be physically possible for me, probably because I drank too much Dr. Pepper as a child).  I’ve been reading about it and it turns out caffeine can trigger it.  I decided if not drinking Dr. Pepper means no more near head explosions AND I can actually fall asleep at a reasonable time, maybe it’s worth it.

So, I’m on day 2 sans caffeine and my head hurts like a bitch…

UPDATE:  I only lasted 4 days.  I wasn’t sleeping any better, my head was still hurting, and I was exhausted.  Going back to the no caffeine after lunch-ish time to see if that helps.  I just can’t resist the 23 flavors!!


I’m pregnant…again. August 9, 2008

Filed under: Pregnancy — Sara @ 9:20 pm
23 weeks prego.

23 weeks prego.

So most of you already know this, but in case you didn’t, I’m having another baby in December.  Surprise, Terry!  😉 I was somehow under the impression that pregnancy would be the same every time.  I was wrong.

At Nate’s baby shower, I remember bragging to my table of friends that the best part of pregnancy was bigger boobs and longer nails.  Your hair looks pretty good and migraines miraculously stop, too.  One of them said, “What about the baby?”  I responded that that came after pregnancy so it didn’t count.  I didn’t really have any weird cravings or illnesses, no scares of miscarriage.  There really was no worst part of my first pregnancy.  Sure I was tired the first trimester, but nothing like after I had Nate.  And near the end, my back started to hurt, but that’s expected when you’re carrying around an extra 30 pounds.

The only complaints I really had were that Terry wasn’t around because he was working in Boston during most of the pregnancy and the child that resulted from it was mildly demon-ish (yes it’s a word) for the first 2 months.  We were pretty much convinced that we weren’t having any more children after what Nate put us through.  But somehow the lack of sleep and cuteness that accumulated over the next 6 months changed our minds.  Lucky for baby #2!

So this time around, I felt nauseous from the day I peed on the stick until 14 weeks in.  I’m still waiting for my boobs to get crazy big and my nails to not break the second I try to use them for anything.  Plus, I’m chasing around a 14 month old, so that glorious second trimester where you feel wonderful, well-rested, and look “glowing” is totally not happening.

I still get migraines, usually at least once a week, and I can’t take the miracle drug invented to treat them or my baby might be born without some of her limbs (I call it a her but we have no clue what we’re having).  I’ve considered taking the risk when my head is about to explode, but ultimately decided the pain is temporary and missing limbs are permanent so the baby wins.  The drugs they do give me for them (somehow narcotics are safe?!?) make me shakey and restless so I can’t take them anywhere near bed time.  Or when I have Nate by myself.  So I’m pretty much screwed.

I’ve also got a little germ-infested Natertot on my hip most of the day, so I’ve had to deal with more than my fair share of illness over the past 6 months.  It turns out, at least in my case, that it takes your body twice as long to recover when you’re pregnant.  First, there was a stomach virus that passed around the entire family. Most were affected for 2-3 days, but I spent an entire week in bed or by the toilet.  Thank god for Grandmas.

The weekend after the plague ended for me, I spent both Saturday and Sunday at the doctor.  Saturday I woke up with vertigo (of course I had no idea that’s what it was and was convinced I was miscarrying).  Took some drugs and spent a lot of time in bed and the room-is-spinning feeling was gone after a few days.  Sunday, I woke up with terrible pain on the left side of my uterus area and was again convinced I was having a miscarriage.  So we took a trip to the ER, had a sonogram, waited to see the doctor for a few hours, all at the low price of $2000 (yay high deductibles!), and everything turned out fine.

Nate was kind enough to share another stomach virus with me last week.  His lasted a week.  It’s been 8 days and I’m still waiting to not feel like I ate razor blades.  I know everyone gets sick now and then, but this is getting ridiculous.  Seriously, it’s hard enough being pregnant, I don’t need any more unrelated ails.  kthx.

I’ve had some cravings this time, like salsa, popcorn, and chocolate, all of which I don’t normally like.  I’ve also wanted pickles and even alcohol.  Luckily, Terry is around this time, so I can send him out at 10pm to satisfy my random needs (except for alcohol, I don’t know why he won’t buy it for me…).  It’s also been fun telling everyone how different this pregnancy was from Nate’s, because everyone is convinced it’s a girl.  Sadly, that’s an unreliable litmus test given the pregnancy stories I’ve solicited recently.  So we really won’t know what flavor of baby I’ve been growing until it joins us in December.  We do already have a pink room, though, so I’m crossing my fingers!  I can only hope a terrible pregnancy produces a sweeter baby…